RED-FACED BIN LADEN ADMITS LATEST TAPE WAS A RERUN (satire?) by Andy Borowitz

Article image Al Jazeera Accuses Madman of "Phoning it In"
One day after a supposedly new terror tape by Osama bin Laden was broadcast on the Arabic-language TV network Al Jazeera, the terror mastermind admitted that the tape, which had been billed as a completely new terror tape, was actually a rerun from October 2004.

"I had promised my fans that I was going to be releasing a new terror tape with 100% new material," an embarrassed Mr. bin Laden said in an official statement posted on his fan club's website today.

"I know I let my fans down, and that's what hurts most of all."

The admission that Mr. bin Laden's latest tape was in fact a rerun sent shock waves through the executive corridors of Al Jazeera, which had been promoting a new tape from Mr. bin Laden for weeks in an effort to mine ratings gold.

"Whenever there's a new bin Laden tape, that's appointment television for our viewers," one Al Jazeera executive said. "For him to pull something like this is just unforgivable."

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